Wednesday, February 3, 2010


Welcome back to Weasel Wednesday.  This is a place we can talk freely about weasels.  Who decides ultimately what makes someone a weasel?  That’s easy. We do.  Feel free to add your own weasel commentary and maybe it will be featured on the next WW.  As we can see there is no shortage of weaselry and we always have plenty.

This WW, a real live weasel came to live in my ceiling.  And my floor.  Which are the same.  Anyway it sounds like a darn Chihuahua running around in there but I am convinced its just a visiting weasel trying to earn his 20 minutes of fame on the blog.

(This is the North American Crap Weasel... covers himself in crap to avoid predators.  Sounds about right.)

Here’s some extra special treats straight from a Weasel's mouth...The Tainted Tongue

- "I completely disregarded my date and joined in on some sort of Hulk rampage, she approached me and angrily informed me that she was heading home. I think she was anticipating that I would join her, but I didn’t, because she looked like Courtney Love (on a good day, though) and there was still an ample supply of booze to be dealt with…."

- "I did the only honorable thing I could think of. I finished my Chinese food, changed from my business suit into my birthday suit, woke up the psychopathic female, and allowed her to perform fellatio on me before asking that she please collect her things and exit my apartment…."

Now on to our reader weasel contributions..... you peeps make this day worth it every week!  Keep them coming!  So much weaselness in the world...

* You cheat on your gf.. take her to Hawaii.. go all crazy on her about other guys when she's doing nothing wrong..then come back home with her.. act all lovey dovey like you guys are great.. then have sex with her.. get up tell her you cheated on her and you are going to san diego and you may do it again.. who knows!! Then when she starts crying you start smiling and A BIG smile!!

* You are on a romantic boat cruise in Paris.... He get's hammered on the boat cruise and tells you that you are a bitch, and that he hates you, your hips are too big, and that he is just using you for sex.

* If he cheats on you for the entire year long relationship with his man-face, midget-like ex who had no idea about you. And you're totally hot so he didn't even cheat up.

* After a few dates and nights of "hanging out", he totally blows you off, don't hear anything from him, and then calls one night because he "needs to crash at your place." Ummmm.... no.

* He either txts you when he's bored or invites you over to snuggle. Boys that do either of the 2 are treating you like the fat girl they know is interested in them (but doesn't have a chance), but they keep her around for entertainment purposes only. Well I'm being that I'm not fat....what's the point of txts and snuggles? Invisible leash law.

* If your bff from your childhood comes into your life gain, meets your boyfriend, and then takes your place in the apartment you shared with said boyfriend..... skank ass bitch weasel. (Oh yes, the weaselettes are out there)

*If he asks to to downplay how much you and him talk to his girlfriend..

* If he hits on you while you’re pregnant

And the weasel of the week award goes to the couch potato weasel.....!!

* If you get back 12 hours early from a soccer tournament because your team was able to get an earlier flight home and you walk into your apartment to see your boyfriend of 2 years f-ing your roommate on YOUR OWN couch...
let me tell ya, THAT sucked! (UMMM...OUCH.  FUCKING WEASELS)

Thanks to Meredith, Lindsey, and Brooke for the super weasel comments last week!

For the first time in WW history, I would like to give a big NON-WEASEL shout out to one of our Batcave besties.  Sometimes the hardest things and the right things are the same.  You did the right thing and would have been a weasel otherwise.  xox


Meagan@Megs7827 said...

This is so funny! My friend does this crazy weasel face thing it makes me pee my pants. Will have to vlog it. Anyways, on to my weasel: Texts you and facebooks you after you are married. Tells you he wishes he was invited to your wedding because he would have said something when the minister said, "speak now or forever hold your peace".

meredith said...

i should write my ex an email and tell the bastard at least he was good for something - his cheating ass is what got him the "weasel of the week award"!!!

Julie said...

stalker weasel: two months after you've broken up with him, your neighbors see him parked in his totally huge truck across your street, staring at your house, drinking beer...then speeds of when he sees neighbors are staring...

weaselette: if you live with a weaselette who sleeps with the guy ANOTHER one of your roomates has been sleeping with, denies it, only to have him return the earring she left in his bed...

Brooke said...

Love it.. Meredith.. HORRIBLE.. SUPER WEASEL!!

Ryeino said...

Damn, fuckin' weasels...will they ever learn?

Stylez said...

I told my wife that I hope she hurries up and gets pregnant so I don't have to have sex with her anymore. Yay! I'm the weasel.