YOU SAW MY BLINKER B***H

It’s been a rough week. I have been feeling a little like I am in college, not necessarily in a good way, but not a bad way either. Just spending more time with friends, eating lots of take out, inside jokes, etc. So anyway I was really dying for a good old-fashioned night out at the G-man. Complete with sweats and Miller Lites and my closest friends. Alas, 2 of my favorite friends and bartenders were doing a reunion guest bartending night at a bar in the city we like to take over. Perfect. I rounded up some fellow Penn Staters in our finest football jerseys, along with a few “we aren’ts” you know who you are.

Anyway we snag a seat at the bar from one of my unsuspecting victims. Then another, and another. Yes. We have 4 seats now. But only 2 are at the bar. I refuse to turn around. I want control of the bar and its tenders. The 2 seats behind me are facing our backs and we decide we look like we are in a car. Hahaha. Now the fun begins. We literally pretended we were in a car for 5 hours at the bar. Normal people would have spent 20 minutes playing this game, but we chose to do it for the entire night. That’s right, right past closing time until we were the only ones left. I bet you are wondering what entails pretending you are in a car. Well I had t pull over every time someone needed to pee, and we did a Chinese fire drill to start. PS The Urban Outfitter decided we were in a Prius because it reminded her of Hebrew school. WTF?? Hahah.

For those of you who know me, I am famous for creating a “bubble with my friends and not liking outsiders. This night was no exception. One of our passengers refused to sit in the trunk. What a Dustard. Anyway he got stuck in the sidecar and so I had to roll down my window every time he wanted a beer. Also at one point I decided we needed to do “car shots." These are not to be confused with “car bombs.” I only do car bombs on 2 occasions. Breakfast and Thanksgiving. Breakfast because when I used to stay up all night in college and wait for Mad Mex to open, I would do car bombs because I swore they tasted like chocolate milk. And Thanksgiving, well because it’s a tradition, duh! So anyway, an unsuspecting outsider refused to leave us alone and I was getting annoyed. How did I get him back? .... He will find out when he gets his credit card bill. J

all i wanna do is to thank you. even though i dont know who you are. you let me change lanes. while i was driving in my car. All i wanna do is to thank you. even though i dont know who you are. you let me change lanes. while i was driving in my car